The Four Letter Syndrome

With the Mother of all Elections just around the corner (they use the term every 5 years), all our living space has been forcefully, and sometimes with choice, filled with star lights of political game-changers and the tradebacks. The Poli-sphere seems to be filled with three brands – Rahul Chhap, Modi Chhap and Kejri Chhap.

If you look at the growth graph of the aforementioned dignitaries, one thing is clear, there is a masala movie in the making. I recently read somewhere; it’s an election between a ‘duffer’, a ‘bluffer’ and a ‘muffler’, and I’d like to add – The junta will suffer.

I write this piece on a day when I find myself a little convinced with regards to my political know-how (which can be compared to the square of a scrap). With my sudden afternoon coffee in my hand, I couldn’t help but notice the non-stop carcass music of some channel going on and on about Kejriwal’s declaration of fighting the elections from Varanasi.

I thought, what a guy. Poor muffler doesn’t even know how deep a trouble he’s in. Fighting the ‘Dharmasevak’ in the land of vermillion! I confess I wasn’t impressed. Why would you make a Rahul Gandhi out of you? Why wouldn’t you fight from someplace safe? Why wouldn’t you defy the odds and go to Delhi to proclaim the heroship? Why would you simply not leave the four-letter madness and rise above everything else for a cleaner image?

And then it hit me. Because he was smart. Smarter than most of us. The Why-Nots started sounding more practical. Here’s a muffler, struggling to find its place in the Indian democratic ‘satta’, being explained as ‘the man who flouts the balances’, with a cause noble or without – a Man who has been able to crack the code. Why wouldn’t he? What a guy.

Mr. Modi has taken years to reach this point. He’s fought wars and conquered routs. He has slowly, not very smartly, but gradually hued the entire internet. Similarly, he has, again, slowly encrypted the hearts of young men starving for jobs. He has become a household name over the years. Kejriwal has stolen the lock to the 2014 Elections, though I personally believe that Modi still holds the key.

Back to the point, Arvind has forced the ‘Media’ into swallowing their own poison. By announcing to contest from Varanasi, he will have constant over-excited media frenzy at his behest, which will most definitely help his party. Also, when he loses, he will also have a chance to say – ‘Kisi ki himmat thi?’ and start with his over sung ballad of rebelling the methodical.

For once, let’s look at a scenario where India votes to acquire the Four Letter Syndrome. I wonder – is Modi prepared? There's a lot that he has to prove. It is very easy to love an idea, equally difficult to stop hating the reality. I wonder if India will be patient after Modi becomes the PM. Will they even wait a week for food, jobs and dreams? Even if the purple colored development model is feasible, can Modi do it in a mere 5 years? Fir kya? Every dream that has been doing the ‘Modi-Modi’ jaap since the last five years, will it wait another five years to come to existence? Reform takes time, and support, and Modi has been at odds with both. Will the paper planes learn to fly?

If you ask me, I am scared to bits. What if our choices lead to something big and uneasy? What if I am forced into elections after elections? What if all my money one day vanishes from my accounts and they name the act ‘another scam’? What if I start being scared of my own religion?


Future smirks mysteriously with the answers in its pockets. Till the next.